Preface As you know, this is a new experience for me; I didn’t even do blogging with my students. I have found the process that I go through to get my final writing completed to be a kind of wild ride. I start off thinking I’m going in one direction and halfway through or after leaving and coming back to it, I begin making lots of turns! This piece is no different. What I have discovered is that God is going to show up in everything I write because my faith is a huge part of my journey of grief. Trying to cram that into a two part blog was unrealistic. In other words, I should have come up with a different title for the last blog. So bear with me as I do some regrouping! 😉 .
I lived through the worst day of my life. I didn’t see any way to possibly get through those first hours, days and weeks without praying to God and leaving everything in His hands. I cried out to Him. It was as if I was walking in slow motion, stunned and in shock. I turned everything over to Him and all that I did after that was directed by Him. The people who were taking care of us were called on by God to be there for us. Don’t ignore your call to be there for someone. It could be God telling you to go. Know that when you pray for others, your prayers are heard. They may not be answered as you wanted them to be answered but help is provided; strength is given. I believe that everyone who prayed and still prays for us has helped us on this journey through grief. We were blessed to have been surrounded by love then and now. We asked for mercy and we received grace beyond measure.
I was fortunate enough to be the daughter of Lola and Aubrey and raised in a Christian home. The church was a large part of my life: Church, Sunday School, and Youth Ministries every Sunday, Choir Practice every Wednesday. My social life revolved around church activities, even roller skating and basketball was at our church gym. My dearest friendships were made there. Friends who drove for hours to be with us for Chris’s memorial service. Seeing them walk into the reception following the service was especially comforting and humbling. It’s actually one of the few moments I remember from that day.
Chris Mayville was the best thing that ever happened to me. God sent him to me to teach me to truly love someone with all my heart and soul. Our children were precious gifts of that love. They taught us unconditional love, as the Father has for us. “It’s a love without end. A-men” I hope that those of you who are reading this know this kind of love. If you are struggling and suffering, please seek help. If you are grieving and depressed, seek help. Pray. Give your concerns and worries over to God. Have faith that things will get better.
Chris and I met Rev. Jim Giddens when we attended Wesley Monumental UMC. We attended young couple gatherings at his home with his wife, Linda. When he moved to Skidaway Island UMC, we did, too. God put Jim Giddens in our lives for many reasons but certainly one was to be there for me the day Chris died. His words of comfort, peace and reality helped ground me. He’s the one who led me to Holland Morgan at Hospice Savannah for counseling. Holland Morgan was a God send. He truly helped save me from the depths of depression. He helped me put the pieces of my life back together. I had no idea that those services were available to me as Chris had not received hospice care. Check out the services they offer in your area on their website. For those of you with children who are suffering the pain of loss, hospice has great opportunities for them.
Psalm 107:28-30
Then they cried to the LORD in their trouble, And He brought them out of their distresses. He caused the storm to be still, So that the waves of the sea were hushed. Then they were glad because they were quiet, So He guided them to their desired haven.
Love, Mercy, and Grace 