After losing Maggie, I told the children it would be a while before I was ready to have another dog. Losing she and Chris in a two week time span had been just a little overwhelming.
Six months later I got a phone call from Meghan, my middle child. She and her friends had stopped a man from tossing a puppy into the Savannah River the night before. She asked me if I would just foster him because he was underweight and too young to be adopted. They would get him adopted when he was older. Of course, I agreed. About thirty minutes later, she arrived with the tiniest baby pittie I had ever seen. He was precious with his big floppy ears. Later he would have one up and one down. We called them “derp ears”!
It was love at first sight. He was five weeks old and weighed under 10 pounds. A special diet was required for the first couple of weeks and several vet visits. Our vet fell in love with him. Over the years, he named Koda the poster dog for Pitties. He was a lover not a fighter! He was a huge lap dog.
My youngest daughter and I began the task of naming him in the days following his arrival. We agreed on Koda. In the Sioux language, it means “friend”. Little did I know how appropriate this name was for him.
He was a soccer puppy! My oldest daughter was playing college soccer and I tried to be there for every game. That meant Koda had to do some traveling early in his life. I certainly couldn’t leave him behind with anyone. 😉 So, I’d pack up his belongings and he hit the road with us! We snuck him into games in a small, unzipped duffle bag and he just chilled. He laid in my lap and slept in the car.
He loved to sleep on the sofa with me. I wasn’t sleeping in my bed. It was just too hard. For a long time he could sleep in my lap or on top of me when I laid down. When he got too big for that he would push himself between the back of the sofa and me with his nose. For the next four years of his life that was his favorite place to be. It was the sweetest. His snuggles comforted me on many a night that first year after Chris died. It did get somewhat challenging when he weighed 75 pounds but somehow we made it work. Occasionally he would stretch and push his feet into my back, which often left me on the floor!
When he was a little over a year old, he had his first seizure. He was usually asleep at night when they occurred. He would begin convulsing. He foamed at the mouth. He lost control of his bladder. I knew from training at school and experience with students that staying calm was important, speaking softly, giving him a safe space. It was horrible to watch but the worst part was actually the time after the seizure would end, the post-ictal phase. This was when he would try to walk but he was disoriented, confused, restless, panting heavily and even experience temporary blindness.
He was diagnosed with Idiopathic epilepsy, an inherited disorder. He was placed on medication- phenobarbital and potassium bromide. Eventually, I had to start administering a shot of diazepan/Valium to him rectally as soon as a seizure began to try to keep him from cluster seizing.
In the beginning, he was asleep when the seizure started. Later and when they occurred more frequently they occurred while he was awake. He went from single seizure events to clusters and from once every couple of months to once every three weeks.
He was the sweetest, most loving dog I’ve ever known. He just wanted to hang out with me. When I couldn’t sleep he would stay up with me. We’d go for late night walks. He just wanted to cuddle. He’d jump up on top of you as soon as you levered the recliner back!
When he was four years old, he was worn out. Our vet had gone above and beyond to help him and me. He was just amazing. I am so thankful for his willingness to try everything possible to try to relieve him of these gripping seizures. He even kept him for 10 days trying a new procedure with him, even sleeping at the office once with him.
In addition to the tender, loving care Koda received from the vet, he was spoiled rotten by our fabulous Dogsitter! She loved Koda so much. I never worried about him when I left her in charge. She even handled seizures on her own. I could never thank her enough for all that she did for us.
In the summer of 2016, Koda wasn’t doing well. His seizures were coming on more frequently and often. He was zoning out while standing. He wasn’t walking very well. I was beginning to question his quality of life. I left for a trip with much concern about his well being. My youngest daughter and our trusted dog sitter were caring for him. I received a call from them saying that he couldn’t walk up the stairs anymore so they had put his kennel in the entryway downstairs. They later called to say he wasn’t leaving the kennel. I told them to call the vet and take him in. I asked for no heroic measures but rather to make him comfortable. The vet was so upset seeing him like this. He knew what needed to be done but it was breaking his heart to have to do it. It had only been a month or two since he had said he couldn’t put him down. And I had said I wouldn’t want anyone else to do it. Now, here he was being asked to do the unthinkable. I told them to focus on his quality of life, not his age. If they felt he couldn’t fully recover, it was time to let him go. I was the hardest decision I’ve ever made.
The saying,”Who rescued who?”, totally describes my relationship with Koda. He came into my life when I needed his unconditional love. He gave it to me completely. I did everything I could for him and loved him more than any other dog we’ve ever owned. He was mine and I was his. Until we meet again, my sweet boy………
Love, Mercy, and Grace 
I remember him as a puppy. So small and cute, he was just perfect.
He made an impression on everyone he met. He was a special puppy. 😊