Month: August 2017

Yes, Charles Shultz was correct! Here’s how I know! 

Earlier I shared my sweet Koda story with you. It was story that ended much too soon and hurt me to the core when it ended. I didn’t know when I’d be ready for another dog. My girls were all about me getting a new dog, but I had their dogs around most of the time and was just fine with them. I was doing a good bit of traveling and it was nice not to have to worry about arrangements for a pet. (The girls were responsible for getting caretakers if I had their animals!) 

Not being ready to have another dog didn’t mean that I didn’t look at dogs! I was always looking at rescue sites. I saw many sweet faces over the year. I was also looking at and researching Labradoodles. I thought a non-shedding or even less- shedding dog would be a welcome reprieve from my youngest daughter’s black lab. Even our pitties were shedders. Another point of consideration was whether or not I was ready to handle a puppy again or did I want an older dog. 

As with just about everything else in my life in the last five years, I handed it over to God and figured when the time was right I would know it.

Sure enough, three and a half weeks ago, everything fell into place as perfect as you please. A precious, little black female labradoodle in Arkansas was reduced in price. I had really only looked at the blondes and had even decided on the shade of coat I liked, so feeling drawn to this black female was a little strange. I called to find out what was going on with her. The breeder said that she was already ten weeks old and people in the south generally didn’t like black dogs. I told her I needed to think about it overnight because I hadn’t really considered a black one. Five minutes later, my friend showed me a Facebook post of two adorable Labradoodles that were available; one was a black female and one was a blonde male. I contacted the person who made the post. As luck would have it. we actually have several mutual friends, which made me more comfortable contacting her. She shared information about the puppies and gave me info on how to contact the mother’s owner, Eric. She was actually getting one of the puppies. I contacted the owner and we had a very pleasant conversation. In the end, he told me that two people were coming to look at the blonde boy the next day, which was Sunday. He would let me know at the end of the day how that had gone. Again, I was facing a little black female as my option. 

I anxiously watched my phone all afternoon Sunday. It wasn’t until after dinner that the phone rang. 

Eric said he had an interesting day and wasn’t sure how I was going to respond. One of the people who came to look at the blonde puppy decided on the black female instead. So, the blonde male was the last puppy. The blonde that I had wanted to begin with was available. It was meant to be! I put a deposit on him because I was out of town and couldn’t get there until the end of the week and wanted to be sure that he was still there. 

I was so excited- a little anxious but excited. 

I shared the news with the kids. I was afraid they would think I was crazy but I couldn’t have been more sane. The kids were all very supportive. 

My youngest asked me if I knew what day it was. I told her the date. She said, ” Mom, today is the first anniversary of the day we had to put Koda down.” ……. It was time for a new puppy. 

Next came the lists of things to shop for and a list of possible names. Fun times shopping and preparing for puppy to come. 
Friday arrived and my youngest daughter, my friend, Susan, and I headed south on I-95 to Brunswick to meet and pick up puppy.  I was down to a couple of names for him-  Max, Samson and Tucker. Meeting him in person would determine which name stuck! Walking in the house, we found two puppies rough housing and chasing Luna, their moma. Tucker, the only boy in an 8 puppy litter, was true to form for all boy! Owner warned that he was the biggest cryer at the vet. Thankfully, he figured out pretty quickly that I wasn’t going to respond to crying and it stopped. He loves to play. We go hard and fast and then he collapses and takes a nap! 

Tucker has been home for three weeks and I couldn’t be happier. He is adorable. He keeps me on my toes. He’s very smart and catches on quickly to what’s allowed and what isn’t. He’s learned that when he is beside me and calm he gets his back and tummy rubbed, which he loves! I think we’re going to be great buddies! 

“Once you have had a wonderful dog, a life without one, is a life diminished.” —Dean Koontz 

So true. So very true! 

Is there anything more stressful and yet exciting as moving day?! Okay, maybe your wedding! But since I’m in the midst of another move with my youngest daughter, I’m feeling like moving is a real close 2nd and we often do it more often than we marry! Over the years I have done quite a bit of moving. I only moved once with my parents and it was to a new house in the same town. 

Upon graduation from college, I lived in an apartment with a friend and then alone in an apartment. I moved to an apartment in Savannah the summer before my wedding in November in order to start my new teaching position here. After our wedding, Chris added his belongings to mine in my apartment. 

After a year, we moved into our first home. 

In our 25 years here, we lived in four  different homes. Each home holds special memories for me and my children. We were in each house long enough to really enjoy our time in them and to accumulate a lot of stuff! I loved having garage sales to try to clear things out. Chris had never experienced one before our first one and boy was he in for a treat! He couldn’t believe that people would go though a box of our old clothes and then pay me to take them home. He just couldn’t get over the things people would buy. I made $800 on my first garage sale! I can still see Chris’s face when I told him that- totally shocked and shaking his head.  He was actually quite proud of me. 

We moved into our last home in November 1999. It was a fabulous house with a great front yard and a pool in the backyard. There was also a huge playroom. Our children were 4, 10 and 12. It was the perfect house for us. It needed some work when we first moved in and other changes were done over time, mostly cosmetic.
Between the huge playroom and the pool, our house was the gathering place for the kids in the neighborhood. I loved that! We had birthday pool parties and end of school parties, but the best pool party was the Polar Bear Plunge held on New Year’s Day. Adults and kids squealing and laughing at the top of their lungs and yes, sometimes turning blue. We enjoyed hot chocolate and brownies. Great memories were made! 

When Chris died in February 2012, the house became a constant reminder of Chris. The memories of him were everywhere. It was a very strange feeling to be there and never have him come home. I often found myself looking up hoping to see him walk through the doors. Pulling up to the driveway and not seeing his car there caused my heart to sink. Part of me wanted out of the house immediately, but my head knew that doing something that big shouldn’t be a knee jerk reaction. Everything I read and the advice of my minister and counselor was not to make a life decision like that within the first year of Chris’s death. Everyone grieves differently and in their own time take the steps they need to in their journey toward healing. I have friends who are widows/widowers and they have stayed in their family home. Others moved in the first year.  Because of circumstances beyond my control, I stayed.  I had to hire help to care of the yard and the pool. Of course, things broke in the house and I was on my own to handle them. Thankfully many of Chris’s friends had left business cards with me and I had his daily planners that had contacts listed. I called on these sweet men to help and they did. 

I knew that when my youngest left for college I would be lost in the house. It was perfect size for a family of five but way too big for one person. So in the spring of her junior year, I decided that I needed to look at selling the house and finding a place to continue the journey of healing; someplace that I would be safe and comfortable and that Katie would be able to feel was home so that she would want to come back to it from college. I called a friend who is a realtor and she agreed to help me. The house was on the market for a week before I had a serious offer on it. I freaked out. She had shown me many houses during the weeks before listing mine but nothing was really clicking as “the house for me”. Now I had to find a house! I didn’t want to settle on something in haste, so I was preparing myself for the possibility of moving to an apartment. I went through listings online every night looking for the perfect place. One night I found a new build putting me 10 minutes from the beach. As soon as I walked in I knew this was the house I was meant to have. I fell in love with it. There’s a security gate, a community dock, and only 24 houses in the community. We all know each other and look out for each other. It’s a great place to be. I am very happy to be here. 
Prior to moving in I held a “Bless this House” party. It was a special afternoon with friends gathered in the empty house to celebrate getting to this place in my journey through grief. 

Moving day was difficult but with the support of family and friends, we did it! As we were taking out the last of the boxes and bags, my youngest daughter said,” It doesn’t feel like home anymore. I’m okay leaving.” She’ll never know how much those words meant to me that day. 
We carried the precious memories created there out of the door with us and left the stresses of the upkeep of the nineteen sixty something house behind us. 

I’ve been in the new house for three years and have never questioned my decision to move or the home I chose to purchase. I believe that God led me to that decision at right time and everything fell right into place. 

-Surrounded by love, seeking mercy, and receiving grace. 

I am blessed.