Month: October 2018

The anticipation and preparation leading up to the holiday is different now. Of course, a large part of that comes from the empty nest syndrome I’m in all by myself. I do recognize that.

I will admit Halloween was not a holiday I looked forward to very much, even when the children were little.I was a teacher at that time and by the time I had managed to survive a day with elementary school children on Halloween, I didn’t have much left in me for the excitement level to match my own children’s. I was exhausted, but as soon as we walked through the doors of the house, we went full speed ahead to eat some pizza and get dressed.

Remember, prior to the actual day of the event there were days of costume preparation taking place- the decision on what to be, how to execute it, purchasing the supplies, and actually putting the costume together. Okay, I admit to purchasing some ready made costumes to make my work a little less stressful.

Back to the day of…Once I had managed to get everyone dressed and happy, it was Chris’s turn. Most years he walked the kids around without me. I would go to the first couple of houses and then retreat back home to hand out the candy. He was a lifesaver! On those rare Halloweens that occurred on Saturday, I actually enjoyed the festivities! Once my son was too old to participate, I let him hand out the candy and Chris and I walked with our friends while the kiddos ran ahead of us. That was a fun time.

The memories have been running through my head all day- Halloween with the church group at The Landings, the first Trick or Treat for each child, the fun costumes, the laughter, and Chris scaring the kids.

Those days are long gone but I have been pretty blue today and I’m not really into the whole scene this year. I don’t have enough candy- because I’ve eaten most of it. My house isn’t decorated outside at all because I just haven’t made time to do it. My front entrance is clogged with bags and boxes that I dropped there when I unloaded my car yesterday from my week out of town. Tucker won’t be finished with the groomer until at least 5:00. I told her not to rush. We weren’t going anywhere.

Maybe I’ll just sit in a chair out front with my candy basket and pass out candy til it’s gone! I should at least oooo and ahhhh over some costumes, right?!

I wish Chris were here to motivate me, to laugh with me, have a glass of wine and some candy with me; but he’s not. I’m alone. It’s hard to be alone. It’s hard to be one. There’s not an easy fix. I am working on it and know that God is pointing me to the path He wants me to take. It’s been 7 Halloweens and I still struggle with what to do with myself. I’ve given it to God and thankfully He gets me through these tough spots. I spent most of today with my sweet miniature horses, getting them ready for their first outting this Sunday.

I look forward to seeing everyone else’s pictures tonight and vicariously sharing your joy. Have fun and treasure today and the memories you’re making.

I’ve been called many names in my life; some good, some not so good. Being call wife, daughter, MiMi and Mom are blessings beyond compare. Outside of those, one of my favorite names is Moma Mayville. This name was given to me by a very special group of young women.

First, here’s some background information. My oldest daughter began playing travel soccer at the age of 12. For us, travel soccer was more than just traveling to away games on weekends, we traveled to go to home games, too. We even traveled an hour one way to practice during some of this time. Often, we had to put our daughter in the care of others. Sometimes relatives but mostly other parents who were amazing people who became dear friends. They took our daughter in as one of theirs. We were so thankful for them.

Fast forward to college soccer. My daughter chose to play for Armstrong Atlantic State University. She was going to be in Savannah, with us! Woohoo! We were thrilled for many reasons and in hindsight, God had us in His hands for that decision.

There was a parent get together luncheon prior to the first home game of the season. We were able to meet all of the player’s parents. During the “meeting” part of the gathering, Chris and I announced that since we were living here that we would be glad to help the girls or parents out in any way that we could. We gave them our phone numbers and hoped they knew we were serious.

I never imagined how that one statement would change my life. Over the college years, we helped with car issues and gave doctor recommendations. We had international student athletes have Thanksgiving with us. They rallied around Meghan when she blew out her knee during the Peachbelt Conference Championship game and during her recovery.

I conducted a Creative Thinking Workshop for the Education Department at Armstrong and had AASU Soccer players walk in. That was awesome. One of the most rewarding moments was assisting two AASU education majors to get a teaching position at the school where I worked. They are awesome teachers!

We were part of an incredible group of coaches, young women, and families. We were so blessed.

When Chris committed suicide in 2012, Meghan was still at AASU. The love and support poured down upon our family by the AASU family was unbelievable. I will never forget hearing the voices of these girls fill our home in the days following Chris’s death. It was such a comforting sound. He loved these girls as if they were his own. He wanted nothing but the best for them.

I didn’t know how I’d walk back on the soccer field without him. I didn’t have to; he was right there. My most treasured moment was when my daughter came out of the locker room before the start of the game on her father’s birthday in September with a rose for me. When I looked up, I saw every member of the team coming to me with a rose and a hug. They laid the rose on the bricks we had bought to honor him and Meghan’s love for her dad. My heart was so full at that moment. I get choked up as I sit here writing about it.

It wasn’t much longer before I received a phone call I had hoped to never receive. A dear friend was on the other end asking me to please get to the hospital to be with her daughter who had been in a very serious accident. She was a graduate and former player on the AASU soccer team. She and her husband were on their way from Atlanta and just needed to know that someone she knew and loved would be there with her. My daughter and I rushed to the hospital. Coach Eric wasn’t too far behind us. This precious child had sustained life threatening injuries and I did as I had promised all those years ago- I was there for their child and then I was there for them. I must add that this young woman has astounded everyone with her recovery. It hasn’t been an easy journey but she continues to persevere and work hard to return to a more independent life. Love you, girl! 😘❤️

I was blessed to attend the beautiful wedding of a former player and her sweetheart.

I have enjoyed time spent with a young woman who stayed in Savannah after college and marriage. Her precious daughter stole my heart and my youngest babysat for her.

I have celebrated on FB with many of the girls who have wed and are now wonderful mothers. I’m happy when I read that they are doing so well in their careers, too! I love keeping up with them.

Not too long ago, another former player was preparing to celebrate her marriage to the love of her life. I had the pleasure of being around these two on several different occasions and they have been guests in my home. They were so happy. Their love is so genuine; however, her parents don’t acknowledge the relationship and didn’t attend the wedding because she is gay. They were getting married in Savannah. My daughter asked me if I’d like to go with her. Without hesitation, I said, “Yes!” When I got out of the car, I heard “Moma Mayville” being yelled from the middle of the square! I saw such joy on this young woman’s face when she saw me, my heart melted. She wrapped me in a bear hug and thanked me for coming and being a part of her special day. I wouldn’t have been anywhere else! I was thrilled to be a part of the celebration!

Seventeen years ago, I couldn’t have imagined how important the soccer friendships I’ve made throughout the years would have impacted me. I truly cherish my soccer friends and their awesome daughters and hope they know how much I love them and appreciate their love and support. Although we don’t see each other face to face very often anymore, through the magic of social media we are able to keep up with each other and I love that!

I have to say that being called Moma Mayville is totally awesome. Know that I will always be here for you girls!

“Once a Pirate, Always a Pirate”